I pull a perfectly square maroon fabric from that cheetah drawstring bag. I lay it down on top of my bed and smooth it out flat to try and get as many of the wrinkles out as I can. I fold it diagonally, making sure the corners match. Then I fold it again, long ways this time. Five more folds. I smooth it with my palms to make sure the creases are permanent.
It's time to be her again. Encasing my forehead, I tie the ends once. Then twice. She will be around for two months and two weeks, no more, no less. The time will pass... I just need to make it through the next few hours; she will go back in the bag and I can be me again. But for now, I stare at her in the large closet door mirror covered with dry erase marker writings.
What will her name be today, she has many. Mom calls her little Mexican or gang member; her poor excuse for humor. JB calls her Jimi Hendrix. To some she does't have a name, but they fear her anyway. Most importantly, those enticed strangers call her Bandana Girl.
"You have enough for every day of the week, don'tchu? I've never seen anyone with that many."
The colors and patters flash in my brain: gray, maroon, white, purple, polka dots with a pink border trim, and cheetah print with a black border trim.
"At first I thought you were a gang banger. I was like 'ooo don't hurt me'." A breathy full-hearted chuckle accompanies his statements making his body jump. 'Why do you wear them?" "It's personal" she says.
I think the short sentences really work for this piece and I like how you wrote the way you say things like "don'tchu" and etc. I'm kind of confused with the italicized voices and the regular font voice. I feel like it is just one voice talking because the regular voice is thinking and going off what the italicized voice is saying and thinking. Does that make sense??
ReplyDeleteThe intricacy with which you fold your bandana in the beginning really proves to readers how important this accessory is to you, letting us know that there is some kind of deeper meaning as to why you wear it! It would've been awesome to get more of a hint as to what that meaning is, but I was definitely intrigued while reading! Wish I could've read the final paper!
ReplyDeleteI really like the amount of imagery that you put into this piece. I agree with Pariis I was confused on who the italicized voices differ from the regular front, but it may be easier to understand when the piece is the full length. Other than that, I really enjoyed it!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Kalia, the description of the bandana folding was excellent and displayed it's importance to the character. Imagery is displayed throughout the entire piece and voice is clearly established. Words like "dont'chu" and "ooo" revealed the character's age.
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